Gus, The Beef Jerky King

So I had to make a road trip last week and on the way back home I took some back roads at a leisurely pace. As I was driving down a lonesome highway in the middle of nowhere I saw a scratchy old billboard advertising “Gus’s Really Good Fresh Beef Jerky 90 Miles.” Below that line, in smaller lettering, were the words “Beef Jerky, Honey, Olives, Restrooms.”

I have expressed my deep affection for such signs in a previous post long ago so I won’t repeat myself here. But I will tell you that for the next 15 minutes as I barreled along with the stereo blaring (Elliott Smith, Pointer Sisters, Steely Dan) I pondered the following:

1.    90 miles seems a long distance from one’s business to post a billboard
2.    Isn’t it contradictory of Gus to advertise his beef jerky as “fresh” since, after all, beef jerky is aged and dried and then vacuum-sealed?
3.    Are people allowed to erect and paint their own billboards, since it sure looked as if that’s exactly what Gus did?

By the time I had mentally gnawed on (not unlike eating beef jerky) these weighty questions, I had passed another of Gus’ billboards reminding me that his really good beef jerky was only 60 miles away. Not long after that was another billboard paid for by Gus letting me know that beef jerky, honey, olives and restrooms were only 30 miles away.

Two more signs and 20 minutes later, I understood that I was witnessing the work of a marketing trailblazer. In this era of online, interactive, viral, contextual and guerilla marketing, not to mention $200 million TV advertising campaigns, Gus had, with his six crappy billboards in the middle of nowhere, totally and completely convinced me that not stopping at his beef jerky shack was something I would regret until the day I died. And I don’t even eat beef jerky.

But stop I did, in a cloud of roadside dust, exactly 500 yards after I saw the final billboard proclaiming “Gus’s Really Good Fresh Beef Jerky 500 Yards.”

However modest you might imagine Gus’s Really Good Fresh Beef Jerky establishment to be, it was far more modest than that. It was a tiny cement building that appeared to be a converted gas station with bumper stickers all over the front door and, as promised for the past 90 miles, walls lined with dozens and dozens of packages of beef jerky and cheap wooden racks of olives, honey and dried fruit. There were also restrooms and, as an unadvertised bonus, you could feed Gus’ three immensely crabby chickens for 25 cents if you so chose.

The place was pretty crowded, and I jostled among my fellow travelers trying to choose between hot jerky, teriyaki jerky, elk jerky or sweet and sour jerky. I finally decided to go old school with my beef jerky selection and buy the original “cowboy” flavor.  It cost 8 bucks (three packages for $20), which seemed kind of expensive, but then again I’m no beef jerky expert and besides, I was still under the Gus’ magic marketing spell. I HAD to buy it.

I took a picture of Gus’ beef jerky empire, saluted his evil genius and drove off. About 30 minutes later, I passed a big, modern-looking store with a fancy sign advertising “the world’s best beef jerky.” Poor bastards, I thought, as I sped past. I already had my beef jerky, as did everyone else around these parts, courtesy of Gus. Why would we ever stop at this place?

I actually have a piece of Gus’ jerky sitting next to me on a plate as I write this. I tap out a paragraph, then chew, chew, chew for 10 minutes or so before going back to writing. As eating endeavors go, it’s time-consuming and a bit tiring, but it IS really good beef jerky.

Comments

[vinze]

gus ur jerky sucks

[BRUZER & BUCKETS]

MY WIFE AND I LIVE IN SOUTH FLORIDA, ON A ROAD TRIP A FEW YEARS BACK WE FOUND OURSELF ON HIGHWAY 395 AND SAW A SIGN THAT SAID .. .. JERKEY 15 MILES AHEAD. IT WAS GUSS FRESH JERKY IN OLANCHA CA .NOW WE HAVE ALL HAD JERKY BEFORE BUT THIS WAS LIKE A RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE..THE HOT-N- SWEET JERKY WAS THE BOMB !!!!!! WE BOUGHT 6 PACKAGES AND HIT THE ROAD TO JERKY NIRVANA….

[travis]

this is the best jerky ever and the hot and sweet one is sso good it changed my life thats how good it is thanks GUS

[Mike Leland]

Gus has a website now.

http://www.freshjerky.com

[Kieran Bergin]

Hi Chris - wondering where you've gone. Not getting any response on the usual phones and e-mails. Are you OK? xoxo

Kieran

[Lafonda and Crew]

Hey.... Im just wondering..... What is Guss's telephone number? and possibly his cell phone number?

[Lafonda and Crew]

Coming back from a long day of snowboarding, we came across an old little shack covered in stickers. To our surprise they advertised really good fresh jerky. The five of us walked in with a creepy feeling, not knowing what to expect. We sampled the jerky and knew we had to have it. we ordered every flavor they had to offer. Since then, my taste buds have never tasted this level of satisfaction.

Hugs and Kisses,
Lafonda and Crew

P.S. One of my crew members has never been the same because of his experience in your funky bathroom. He hasn't talked for two days and has been crying ever since. My sugestion would be to fix your creepy bathroom and make a nice one suitable for all ages so no little kids, like my friend, would get scared.

[Ryan]

I stopped at Gus's today and the jerky is the best i have ever had, it is a small crappy looking shack and the billboard do look like something Gus made himself, being there earlier today this article was cracked me up...great article chris

[Beef Jerky]

Where exactly is Gus and his beef jerky establishment? I would love to add it as a destination for my next road trip.

That and the Malaysian Beef Jerky store in New York city will be the first in an epic cross country beef jerky binge tour.

[Mike Wolfe]

What up Big Gus, Not only is your jerky the bomb, the chili mango is to die for. Ill be looking for you on my next trip to Vegas @ Amboy, save some chili mango for me. Adios.

[Mike Wolfe]

What up Big Gus, Not only is your jerky the bomb, the chili mango is to die for. Ill be looking for you on my next trip to Vegas @ Amboy, save some chili mango for me. Adios.

[Nancy Kuzmanoff]

My brother, Jeff Kuzmanoff told me that you have the greatest jerky ever. This is my first order, and am looking forward to my first bite.

[THE MINIX FAMILY]

Gus'es beef jerky is off the hook! Garlic stuffed olives were awesome. Could not wait to make pit stop for jerky. Thanks Gus!!!!

[oh yeah]

GUS IS THE KING! I LOVE HIS STORE!

[gus crabby chicken]

thank you for stopping we are 6 chickens now and getting hungry see you next time matilda almost the best chick!!

[Kieran]

Hi Chris - I'm catching up on my post-Christmas reading, and just looked at your most recent 6 articles. Interesting material, as always. I also note that there's a tendency to food and beverage in your subjects.

I'm guessing that the job may be taking up lots of timre, since you haven't written anything in the last three months. Hope to see you back on line soon.

I ran across a wonderful subject for a food article yesterday. We had dinner at a seafood place near us called the Bluewater Grill. On the wine list, there was a selection alled "Fat Bastard". Marilyn found this so amusing she had to try it, despite having one fat bastard at the table already. Imagine that scene playing out with Danny DeVito and Bette Midler as the lead charaters in "Ruthless People". But don't write any of it down until the Screenwriters Guild strike is settled.

[Heidi]

Castro returns to the blogosphere! Glad you're back, I get a big kick out of these stories (although I am noticing they often trend towards food.... :)

[cathy larocca]

yeah, chris is back. great story!

[Brian Nelson]

that is a really good story